Threads
by TheGuardianKnux
Summary: It was suppose to be a harmless prank really, nothing else. Transform the bastard into a frog and teach'em a lesson! Except, for an Arthur Kirkland, the United Kingdom, it wouldn't be. After hexing his mortal enemy, he'll get more than he bargined for after the other is perminently changed into a child, whom he will have to raise, and starts to figure out odd secrets of his past.
1. When All is Said and Done

**Author's Note, TheGuardianKnux: And here is a small pet project of ours, among other small projects which are really just distractions from Annzy's PROFIT~ XDD So blame me for this one. ^^' But I hope you all enjoy what is to come from what really started more as a role play if anything. **

**Author's Note, Annzy Bananzy: A really awesome RP nonetheless, but, you know, whatever~ XD (It really is a distraction though so APPRECIATE IT).  
**  
To say that today was the worst day of England, or Arthur Kirkland's life, was a complete understatement.

And on top of that, it was pouring rain in the streets of a quaint French town, and France was one of the last places Arthur would like to be, but this evening he was here for good reason:

He had done something unforgivable. Completely and utterly terrible. And usually when one did such an act, they felt tremendous guilt and a hint of responsibility.

And had you known what he had done, you would probably do the same thing.

And his feelings of shame, guilt and despair only increased as he neared the elegant iron gate of a tall, and now foreboding mansion.

He had to take many deep breaths to calm himself, even though they seemed to have the completely opposite affect: each breath of the damp air was like another stab in his already heavy torso. He was so distraught that he hadn't even bothered to bring his umbrella, meaning the pouring rain was trickling down his hair and all over his clothes, which he usually tries to keep so put-together.

But he had to keep moving; he himself didn't matter right now, all that did was getting past the gate and into the mansion that he had always hated going into...

Though this time was worse than all the others.

As he groped about to find a way to enter, he noticed that the latch on the gate was mysteriously... Open, letting the slightly rusted iron swing open with a chilling creak. Many had been to this place, and usually to them, the gate only looked grandiose- not wicked and entangling, like the claws of some fantastical beast.

This time though, it was if the gate was trying to keep bide Arthur in, and give him a false sense of comfort...

As did the towering mansion, its wondrous panes of glass shielding the rain out, as if providing some sort of warmth to the already dampened, tired, and disheveled Brit... But also seemingly, hiding something... On usual occurrences, Arthur would dismiss the stain glass as nothing but, "a frivolous" waste of money and resources that could be used for the poor," but this time... The glass was different... More nervous and secretive...

Arthur shivered as he stared up at it. He had no time to think about how the setting was foreshadowing events to come - he had to actually _get_ to those events!

He shuffled into the mansion and, as part of habit, rubbed his feet on the entrance mat before running inside. His heavy breathing didn't allow him to call out any names, so he started to search every room...He didn't have to look far however when he heard a wailing cry coming down from the first hall, close to the entry and past the staircase. It sounded completely terrified, scared and hysterical.

The sound sent another shock of guilt through his freezing body, but he didn't have time to pity himself as he burst into the room and took the crying person into his arms. "I-it's okay..." he said quietly, breathlessly. It was time to face the fact that the water on his face wasn't just from the rain...

In his arms was a precious one year old child. He had long, tumbling golden curls that went down his back and to the floor, making him look like a beautiful little china doll. Which wasn't helped by his pale skin, rosy cheeks, and glassy baby blue eyes.

Once he was in Arthur's hold though, his crying stopped abruptly and he stared in wide eyed silence.

Arthur took a deep, shuddering breath and buried his face in his long tumults of hair, shaking with unheard sobs. He did this... oh my god - _he did this_. He had never meant for it to get this far - it was just supposed to be a harmless prank...

So how did it turn out so harmful?

The poor, seemingly abandoned child left no answers as he cooed with interest. Had Papa finally come home? Why had he left him all alone?! He was hungry! And cold! It was freezing in here!

Cooing more, the baby boy began tugging at Arthur's ears, babbling with simple curiosity, and then falling silent.

Arthur sniffled and lifted his head to really look at the little boy in his arms, finally realizing that if he didn't feel cold to him, he must feel freezing. And he looked so skinny... far too skinny...

"W-would you..." he started, having to swallow before speaking again. "Like something to eat... Francis?"

Francis stared deeply into his eyes, completely silent and thinking. Why was Papa speaking this really weird gibberish? He couldn't understand what he was saying! It sure didn't sound like Mama's French!

Tearing up, he cocked his head and gave a look of confusion, while also shivering due to the cold.

Arthur blinked at him, wondering why he wasn't responding, before a light bulb went off in his brain. He swore to himself - of course... Francis was one years old again, he obviously wouldn't be speaking anything other than his national language - French.

The problem? Arthur only knew a few sentences in French... Since he had a natural hate for anything with such relation.

"N-nourriture...?" he said, most likely butchering the pronunciation.

He saw Francis cringe at that and back away from him. Why was he asking him if he wanted to go eat dirt? Dirt probably wasn't very good.

Unfortunately, little Francis's motor skills weren't all that great, and his hair was in his eyes, so he toppled forwards with a squeal.

"Ah!" Arthur stepped forward and picked him back up again. "We need to put your hair back..." he said with a frown. He chewed at his lip before picking him up and carrying him into the kitchen. Okay, so he couldn't communicate with Francis anymore... No big deal. Actions spoke louder than words...

Francis stared about in wonder, eyes going cross for a little while as he attempted to stare up at Arthur. Eyes swirling a bit, he suddenly noticed... Everything looked kind of blurry!

Babbling softly, he crossed his eyes again and tugged at Arthur's shirt curiously. Where was Papa taking him? And why?

"Don't cross your eyes like that..." Arthur mumbled gruffly, sighing and feeling that tightening in his chest again with each pull of his shirt.

His lifelong nemesis, his full-time yelling partner, the person he loved to hate and vice versa... was reduced to a tiny toddler... And it was all his fault. _All his fault_.

There were books dedicated to spells gone wrong... Entire accounts warning a magic user the horrifying effects of not checking on your spell every step of the way to make sure it's going right, with no unwanted side effects. _Archives_ of all different types of people who were changed for life simply because they hadn't checked their bloody spell.

And yet he still messed up...

He took another deep breath as he set Francis down on one of the chairs, sending a quick prayer that he wouldn't fall of of it. "Just-just stay here, Francis, uh... Rester? Moi, cuire pour vous..." He groaned to himself. Why had he never learned more French!?

Francis just gave a confused look and crossed his eyes again. Um... Why was Papa asking him to lay an egg? He wasn't a chicken! Or wait, maybe he was! Yeah! Maybe he was a scary rooster!

Wondering if he was, he stood up and started to crow happily. Maybe this would solve the language barrier! And then Papa would stop asking him to eat dirt and lay eggs like some sort of weird animal!

Arthur stared at him in confusion. "What are you...?" He picked him up and set him back down to sit on the chair before he fell again. "Just, just... sit!" he said, chewing at his lips before going to check out the fridge. First things first tomorrow... he had to get an English to French translator.

Francis shivered from his command and stared at him in fear. W-What was going on?! He was so confused! Pressing his back against the chair, he curled up in a ball and shivered some more. W-Why was Papa acting so strange?! And where was Mama?!

He stared at his stoic Papa as he inspected the food in the fridge and took out a few different ingredients: eggs, onions, peppers, potatoes, cheese... What was he going to do with all of these...? And why was he still dressed in those wet clothes? He was dripping all over the floor!"

Francis began crying at that. He was starting to feel threatened, and unloved! And it was so cold and blurry in here! Why couldn't he see?! Maybe if he had glasses like Mama he could see!

Trembling, he gazed down from his chair and thought, "Maybe if I got down, I could go find them?"

So he did what Arthur told him not to do, which was try and jump down from the lofty chair and find his Mama and her glasses.

Luckily, Arthur turned around just in time to check on him. His heart nearly skipped a beat when he saw what he was attempting to do. "Don't -!" he screamed, running over to hold him close so he wouldn't fall off of the chair. "You could get hurt!" he chastised, hugging him close and starting to cry again. He was so defenseless... Because of him - he had to take care of him. He had to. He couldn't let anything harm him, he, he couldn't... Not anymore.

Francis gave a squeal at his yelling and started to cry again. This was scary! He couldn't see, his Mother was missing, and Papa seemed really upset and it frightened him! And what confused him more was why he had woken up alone, and on the floor! Mon dieu, what was happening?

Squirming, he tried his best to get out of the other's arms. Papa wasn't well!

"Francis, stop squirming...!" Arthur said, trying to keep him in his grasp. Why was he moving around so much? What was wrong? Why was he crying?! _Damn this bloody language barrier!_

What could he do? He had to calm him down, he didn't want him to cry again, he didn't even want to see him cry again...

In a fit of desperation, he did something he would have never done to the normal Francis.

He kissed him on the forehead.

... In his defense, that had always seemed to calm a young America down when he was being especially fidgety - maybe Francis just needed more attention...

Francis stopped and blinked in confusion, staring up with crossed eyes again. What was that?! Something touched him on the head, but he really wasn't sure what though...

Sniffling, a few more tears trailed down Francis's face as he went silent and gave Arthur another blurry, cross eyed look. It seemed the other had gotten his attention.

Arthur frowned a bit and wiped at the boy's tears gently, even as he himself started crying again. "Oh, Francis..." he whispered, starting to feel choked up. The Francis he knew would have been too proud to cry in front of him, but this one didn't know any better... He wondered who he thought he was, some sort of brother, or cousin? The spell would have eradicated and misplaced his memories, giving him a completely different life... how was his one-year-old mind comprehending all of this?

Francis just blindly looked around with crossed eyes, completely confused. He rubbed his eyes, but every time, it did nothing to help the blurriness! And he felt incredibly uncomfortable not being able to see...

Blinking, he just gave a cross eyed stare to what he assumed was his Father, and didn't say anything, just feeling anxious...

Arthur creased his eyebrows at him. Why were his eyes always crossed like that? Wasn't it hard to see? Curious, he put a finger in front of Francis' nose and waited for him to look at it.

Francis just shifted and looked over at an opposite wall in confusion, having no idea what he was really looking at.

Arthur frowned. Did he have bad vision...? He couldn't remember anything about France needing glasses... wait... That was right - he remembered once about Francis complaining about his contacts, something about them hurting his eyes. If he had contacts, that must mean he had glasses somewhere, right?

"Stay tight, Francis..." Arthur tried to speak soothingly, since he knew Francis couldn't understand him. If he couldn't know what he was saying, then he may as well try to portray that he wasn't going to hurt him, or something else.

He started walking through the mansion then, upstairs to search for Francis' room, and some glasses.

Luckily, Francis stayed and smiled softly as he bounced on the couch. Where was Papa off to now?!

Unluckily for Arthur, he soon found out that he... Had never been in much of Francis's house before. Whenever he had parties, they were always in the ballroom... In the West end... But otherwise, he had kept a tight lock on the other ends off his house... And he could remember the other bragging about it at his Christmas Party.

"You better not go to room 303~" Francis teased, taking a swig of wine and giving a cat like smile to Arthur, Alfred, and some other nations, "That's where I tend to keep the Cadavers- and in most societies, those really aren't fun props for a party~" he then heaved a dramatic sigh and adjusted his glasses: these were red and green, trimmed with white, sparkles, and small Christmas trees for the celebratory evening, "Such a shame- I love tearing open dead people at parties and spraying blood and guts all over the cake~"

Arthur shivered at the memory, and one solitary fact remained in his head - _don't open door 303_. Still, the use of a number system made Arthur suspect that the door were labeled, and hopefully one would be labeled "Bedroom"... Only it would probably be in French - _damn it!_

Except... At closer inspection the doors... Weren't, really labeled... One was labeled door 7023492039403 and another was labeled door blanc so... It seemed Francis had done the labeling at pure random, and for no reason...

And after opening one door, Arthur felt a bit disturbed... Since this one was coated in what looked like blood, and seemingly human body parts...

He quickly closed the door, heaving a deep breath. This was wrong... He was traversing through his enemy's house without his permission, while he was still in it... He was inspecting his personal life and disrespecting his privacy...

But... the Francis that was alive right now needed glasses, and damn it, he had to find them...

Taking a deep breath, he shook himself and forced him to forget about the creepier parts of this large mansion. The old France may have had some severe problems... But the new France won't.

He promised.

And right he was about the "problems" part when he opened up a few more doors. One of them contained tons of middle age torture devices that had... Plastic doll limbs sticking out of them... Another contained sharp objects sticking out of every available surface, and another had... Wax replicas of Arthur just standing or sitting in different poses.. And some with their heads chopped off with ridiculous hats on their heads... It seemed Francis had a few too many issues he apparently tried to keep hidden...

_Glasses_, Arthur thought to himself, swallowing and trying to hold back the tears he was feeling. Was France really so troubled? He had always seemed put-together in front of everyone else, certainly no warning signs... W-well, maybe there were a few, but... but that was always seen as just eccentric for him...

_Glasses_, Arthur reminded himself again, shaking his head and taking a slightly more wobbly step forward. _I have to find the glasses..._

Another room opened up to something more peaceful yet... Incredibly depressing... It was a nursery, all decked out in victorian furniture... Everything color coded a pretty pink, except for a quilt hanging off the side of a crib that was... A British Flag, with phrases embroidered into it... And beside it a little china doll meant to look like someone... Someone familiar...

Despite himself, he walked forward to inspect the flag and doll a little bit more. _Just enough to read the words..._ he promised himself, swallowing. His ears starting ringing from the deathly silence in the air... this mansion was so creepy - how did Francis live in such a big place all by himself?

The blanket had loving phrases inscribed on it, while the doll... Had messy blonde hair, piercing green eyes... And.. Wait, were those _his_ eyebrows?!

The doll was dressed in one of his nicer outfits as well! And it looked so detailed yet slightly worn... As if someone had... Loved it, very much...

He shivered and took a step backwards, almost tripping as he did so. Wh-what the hell was this?! France hated him - that was one of the facts of _life_! He wouldn't never... never write such things on _his_ flag, nor make a nice china doll of him, unless it was for some sort of weird voodoo...!

He turned around and quickly ran out of the room, slamming the door and taking deep, coarse breaths as he leaned against the door. This was too weird... It was too much, he - he just wanted to find his bloody glasses!

The knowledge of that room, the flag, and the doll left an odd sort of pit of fear and guilt in Arthur's heart as he continued. No sooner however, had he arrived at an ordinate door, that had elegant carvings of the sun, moon and stars on it. Above the maple wood door was a last named written elegantly, "_**Bonnefoy~**_" above it forwards and, backwards for... Some reason.

This had to be it - this _had_ to be the room to his bedroom. He'd go in, find the glasses, and get out. He wouldn't get caught up at looking at anything he shouldn't... Anything that would make him feel like this again...

When he opened the room though, he found something suspicious among the chic bedroom... There was an odd book sticking out of bookshelf, as if it was some sort of... Lever, perhaps?

Another suspicious occurrence was the fact that the room was too... Neat, and stark clean to look as if someone _really_ slept in here...

"Why can't I just find the bloody glasses," Arthur whined to himself. He was too curious to ignore the bookcase, though, so he went forward and pulled on it, sucking in a breath as he anticipated it to swing around, or for the floor to open up, or... something.

And just like that he felt pushed forward as the book case swiveled around and shoved Arthur into a shocking room:

It was a bedroom... Victorian style, that was in bright pastels... Upon the walls hung some cute dresses, there was a large vanity full of makeup in one corner... A huge walk in closet, tons of stuffed animals resting on the bed, a lacy canopy above the Queen sized bed... Shoes haphazardly in one corner, some ballet flats, others different high heels... Rows and rows of bookshelves, some video games in one corner, a TV and movie collection in another, tons of art supplies thrown about the room, a.. Popcorn machine? And lastly, a rack that held tons of prescription... Glasses!

"Finally!" Using a great deal of self-control, he ran towards the rack and looked at them all. He decided to grab a few of varying glass thickness, since he wasn't sure how "blind" Francis was right now... He wasn't worrying about style too much though - if they were in Francis' house, he must have liked them and thought they were fashionable.

As he did, he saw an odd book at his feet was a lock... And a tiny key hanging to the book that presumably opened said book.. the outside of the book was blinding hot pink, with gold cursive written on it, "François Bonnefoy~"

He creased his eyebrows at it. "François"... What was the difference between that name and "Francis" again? He shrugged off the name and picked it up.

... This must be his diary...

Biting his lip, he internally debated whether or not he should read it. Considering his mental and emotional state right now... It was no wonder he chose to put it under his arm and walk out with the bright book and five pairs of glasses, heading back to the little Francis still waiting downstairs.

Once he came back to Francis, he found the other sitting on the couch... _Upside down_ and singing his ABC's in rather broken English, his thick accent ringing out. He had a pretty voice despite it though, and it reminded Arthur of the times that accent of his came out when he openly got nervous doing speeches at meetings... Since a lot of people seemed to glare at him when he did...

He shook his head to clear himself of those thoughts and went up to him with a gentle smile. "Very good!" he complimented with a nod.

Francis fell over in surprise at that yet started giggling. Yay! Papa was starting to feel better! Peering up through his hair with crossed eyes he was surprised when he felt a pair of glasses gently being placed on his face. Blinking slowly, he felt his eyes crossed and stared out. Oh cool! Things weren't blurry anymore- infact, he could see clearly!

Babbling excitedly, he reached out for his Papa, bouncing and smiling and laughing like a healthy little boy.

Which made Arthur smile and laugh and hug him. The sound of a child's laughter always cheered him up, and Francis' had a certain musical quality to it somehow...

"Can you see?" he asked with a warm chuckle, bouncing him up and down on his knee a little.

Francis tilted his head and gave a confused look, his eyes still looking crossed which... Greatly confused Arthur to say the least...

He frowned a little and placed his finger in front of his nose again. "Francis, dear..." Through all this he couldn't help but inwardly laugh at how he was now calling France _dear_. "Please look at my finger and follow it, okay?" He started to slowly move it from one side of his face to the other.

Only one eye followed for some reason, the other sliding down lazily and staying crossed. Francis giggled regardless and tried to grasp Arthur's hands, his curl molded into a music note.

Arthur sighed a little and frowned. What was wrong with Francis? He had never heard of anything like this... Did he have a glass eye? No, he shouldn't - the spell should have reset any and all physical attributes back to this age... and he certainly wouldn't have had a glass eye when he was one!

Deciding he'd look this up later, he picked Francis up and set him gently on the couch. "Sleep... oui?" he said, smiling a little. He needed to find a blanket for him to sleep, though...

Francis just tilted his head and tried to climb off the couch, his crossed eyes darting about. He felt incredibly curious, and slightly happy... Till they heard a crack of thunder, and he gave a feral scream, toppling off the couch and hitting his head on the floor painfully.

"Francis!" Arthur quickly held him up the right way and cradled him, kissing the top of his head almost instinctively. "Are you alright?!" Was France afraid of thunder? Well, he supposed all young children were...

Francis started crying and clinging to Arthur, wailing and sobbing and looking terrified. Little did Arthur know that the previous Francis was terrified of lightning as well...

But Arthur couldn't worry about the past Francis right now - the preset Francis was crying, and needed comfort... Which he was happy to give, in the form of gentle rocking and humming, accompanied by occasional kisses to the forehead.

This caused Francis to slip his eyes shut and nibble on Arthur's coat. Cooing softly, he then began to fall silent and slip into a peaceful slumber, that whisked him away from the turbulence that was now berating Arthur's life... From what he had done..

After a few moments, Francis was completely asleep, leaving Arthur to his thoughts.

There was no doubt about it - he had to take care of Francis now... It was his fault, after all. He should have known better in the first place; he shouldn't have tried to turn him into a little frog for a day, just to get back at him and tease him. Because that's how it got started... that's how he was turned into a helpless baby. Only it wasn't for a day, no...

It was for life.

... So, that was it, then - he had a new ward. He had another colony to raise... But France wasn't a colony, he was already a country -

... Wait, did this Francis realize he was a country?

His eyes widened and he paled, suddenly feeling very cold and hollow. If he analyzed the spell correctly, no matter how unintentional, Francis shouldn't remember _anything_ about his old life... Which means he wouldn't have the innate ability that told him that he wasn't a human - that he was, was...

He didn't have it.

In his mind, he was a normal child...

Arthur felt like crying again, and he held Francis just a little bit tighter. Oh, God, what had he done? How could he explain to him what he was...? He didn't even remember how it was explained to him, or if it was at all...! And how were the others going to react to France being a clumsy baby!?

He rested his head against the couch, his eyes slipping shut. He was exhausted, he realized. Exhausted from coming to France as fast as he could once he realized his mistake, exhausted from traversing through all these rooms, exhausted by his whirling emotions...

Guilt. Fear. Sorrow. Anger, at himself. And yet... he also felt some small sense of joy... Joy of being able to be needed again - the joy of being able to take care of something, a child, and mold him into a respectable human - er, country being...

Once his eyes closed all the way and he felt a calming darkness start to spread over himself, a few things remained:

First and foremost, he had to raise Francis in _his_ house... there was no way he could spend anymore time in this creepy mansion. Second, he needed to learn French, ASAP, and third, he needed to find out what was wrong with Francis' eyes...

Those three thoughts played around in his head as he drifted off to unconsciousness. He had completely forgotten about the pink diary, laying on the ground, forgotten.

But eventually, that diary would be remembered... And wouldn't go away anytime soon...

**AN Annzy B.: This little girl I'm collabing with is taking up all of my time :D But without it you wouldn't get this, so if you want us to KEEP wasting time and spending DAYS RPing to bring you this, WHY DON'T YOU REVIEW. PLEASE SAVE OUR FRAGILE, NERDY EGOS AND REVIEW~ (PnF references are the best XD)  
**


	2. Taking One for the Team

The next day was a hassle, to say the least. As soon as he could, Arthur managed to transport his new "colony" out of France, back to his house, and all before seven in the morning! Which was good... Since... Unfortunately, there was a meeting today... Just great... Though at least he had managed to pick up a baby carrier and some supplies on his adventurous trek back home...

Through it all though, he noticed a very odd thing: Francis was surprisingly quiet and slightly... Eerie... He didn't make much noise, except the occasional babble, but otherwise he didn't cry, or squeal, or do anything when they were in public... He just gazed about with his crossed eyes, saying nothing and looking either curious or just plain shy...

And as for the book from earlier, it was starting to draw more curiosity... Especially as Arthur drove his car to the meeting in a remote building in London.

He was dressed in a rather sharp suit, if he did say so himself, while Francis was dressed in one of Alfred's old baptism gowns from his days as a child. Luckily, Francis had fallen asleep as they drove, a peaceful expression on his glasses framed face, his hair having been braided prettily out of his eyes.

He couldn't help but smile at the, admittedly, beautiful baby boy sleeping next to him. Though he quickly focused back on the road with a pounding heart when he almost collided head first with a car going the opposite way... And this time he couldn't blame the slip-up on backwards American roads since the meeting was in his own "house."

When he finally arrived to the meetinghouse, he hesitated on bringing Francis along, which was quickly squashed. Even if he didn't want the other nations to know just yet, there was absolutely no way he was leaving a defenseless child in a car by himself. Besides, he would have to face the other nations sooner or later...

He picked up the baby carrier and took a deep breath, walking slowly inside. He wondered who else had arrived by now...

It seemed a good chunk of them had arrived. China was going over a few papers at one end of the table, a pair of reading glasses balanced on the tip of his nose. He had a calculator out and was muttering to himself in his native tongue, looking a bit frustrated and stressed. Germany was at another end, typing away quickly at his laptop and looking incredibly focused. Russia was in another spot, staring directly at Arthur with a cold, chilling expression hidden in his violet eyes. Sure, a soft smile was on his lips, but they all knew better that he wasn't actually inviting... To be honest he looked rather tired, with slight bags under his eyes, and worn out...

And then lastly, good ol' Alfred was seated in another spot, tapping away at his 3DS and giggling at some points. He was dressed in semi formal wear- a sweater vest, tie, dress pants, slacks- mostly all tan, white and some black, but his tie was a bunch of stars and stripes.

As soon as Arthur entered the room, Francis' eyes snapped open and he gave a cross eyed look up at Arthur, and then doing the unexpected: He babbled a bit.

Which caused all eyes to gaze up and lock on Arthur in a mixture of surprise and curiosity.

Which put him in spotlight that he neither needed nor wanted right now.

Swallowing, he decided to ignore everyone else first and instead smile at Francis. He was talking - this was good, he wanted to encourage talking. "Very good, Francis... Keep talking," he told him quietly as he walked to his own seat and set up the baby carrier on the table.

Francis immediately fell silent and just stared up, staying silent and crossing his eyes more. His small hands grasped for the blanket, to which he pulled up more to cover some of his face.

Giving a bewildered look, Alfred closed his 3DS and walked over to Arthur curious. Clearing his throat, he asked awkwardly, "Uh, hey man!" he wrung his hands, "Who's the nice little girl you've got there?"

"He's not a girl!" Arthur snapped, just a little too high-strung from everything that had happened. He looked back at Francis, his features softening as he gently moved the blanket away from his face and caressed his cheek. "And... this, this is... France..."

The whole room went dead silent. No one seemed to move a muscle for a moment, and even Francis looked scared as he pulled the blanket back up. The silence stretched on awkwardly for a moment till China stood up, walked over, took his glasses off, and deadpanned with an eye twitch, "What?"

"This is France," Arthur said, just a little more conviction behind his words as he looked up at China with a casual expression. "I... accidentally turned him into a child, and this is how he will be. Growing up... And if you don't mind," he looked around at everyone with an almost... pleading look. "Could you all calm down? You're frightening him... he's very sensitive..." He took him out of the carrier and held him protectively.

Francis immediately curled up, sniffling and shaking. All these people were making him nervous...

China's eyes widened as he stiffened and exclaimed, "Ayiah! England ahen?!" he immediately became cross and looked ready to hit the other, "Why the Hell would you do that, ahen!?"

"Da," Russia agreed calmly, closing his eyes and smiling, "Who would ever want such a selfish brat as a child?"

Arthur bit his lip and swallowed back the insults he wanted to throw back at Russia. So far, Francis was turning out to be anything other than a selfish brat...

"I-it's not like I did it on purpose..." Arthur said quietly, holding Francis tighter. "I was simply trying to play a little prank on him - turn him into a frog for a day, just a day... It turned out like this."

Germany stood up and gave a stern look, walking forward. Leaning down, he inspected a quivering Francis with interest and noted, "I thought we all decided that using hexes against one another would be banned indefinitely," he raised an unamused brow up at the Brit, "Remember?"

Arthur winced a little and looked down, having enough sense to look and feel embarrassed. "... It was, pardon my expression, childish of me, I'll admit... And I'm going to make up for it by raising him again..." He looked up at them all with a set jaw. "So, no one needs to worry..."

Germany and China narrowed their eyes at him, their gaze mixed with suspicion and outright distaste. Russia gave a chilling look and eyed Francis with an outright sadistic delight, and lastly, and most shocking, Alfred gave Arthur a concerned and thoughtful look.

And Alfred felt thoughtful... Of course it was only him and a few other people who knew what Arthur did, but... If everyone else found out... A lot of panic would happen... And to be honest, Alfred felt this sense of wanting to protect Arthur - possibly because of their mutual friendship that they had?

Swallowing, Alfred closed his eyes, stepped forward, and added, "Um, Arthur forgot to mention, but... I went and helped him with the spell," he opened his eyes and lied, "I was the one who messed it up."

Arthur whipped his head around and gave him a very puzzled look. What was he talking about?! He wasn't even there! He was most likely hundred of miles away in his own house playing some horrendous video game when he had been spellcasting. Why was he saying he was the one to mess up...? Did he just want attention? This was not the type of attention you wanted!

"What are you -?" Arthur started to say, but was quickly interrupted.

Alfred looked up and met his gaze. Arthur noticed the other was giving a serious look, one that urged the other to, "just go with it - if you're going down, I'm going with you."

"And because of that," Alfred had interrupted rather swiftly, giving one of his classic smiles - though one could tell it was forced, as he walked over beside Arthur and hugged his arm, "I'm going to help Artie raise little Francis here! I'm sure the little sweetie will be a wonderful, well-behaved individual!"

Arthur gazed at him in shock - completely and utterly dumbfounded. What were these words coming out of Alfred's mouth?! Certainly he couldn't be hearing him correctly...! Did Alfred even know how to raise a child?-?

"Y-you're what?" Arthur asked, quiet enough just for Alfred to hear all of the confusion and mixed feelings he had about this. He knew it probably wouldn't be a bad thing to have another person watching over Francis... After all, that's why there were usually two parents instead of one, but still... Raising a child with Alfred sounded, odd. But maybe that was only because he could still remember raising Alfred...

"I'll explain it in a sec - just hang on," Alfred muttered lowly in his ear.

Meanwhile, Francis was peering out and giving everyone a shy, cross eyed look. This caused China to blink in alarm and inquire in confusion, "What is wrong with his eyes, ahen?"

Russia giggled and noted with glee, "I could smack his skull to fix them, if you like -"

Alfred gave a soft growl and began to pull Arthur and Francis towards an office, "Excuse us why we check up on our darling boy, Vanya." And with that, he shut them both in the office with a relieved sigh.

Arthur was staring at Francis in concern, holding his fingers in front of him again. "Francis, dear... look at me..." He felt like crying; Russia's "offer" had shaken him up more than he'd like to admit, and the fact of the matter was that there was something severely wrong with Francis' eyes. Blinking back tears, he looked up at Alfred and informed him, almost in a military-like fashion, "They've been crossed like this ever since I found him, and watch this." He moved one finger across Francis' face again, trying to get him to do that "glass eye" thing again.

One of Francis's eyes followed his finger, and the other gazed at Alfred as he tilted his head and giggled a bit.

Alfred shivered a bit, finding it rather... Creepy, to say the least. But to be honest... Well, the old Francis had told him to never tell anyone about it, but whenever they were alone back in his Independence days... He remembered whenever Francis got stressed out, or stopped giving a damn his eyes did that...

"Hey, uh, Arthur?" Alfred piped up softly, swallowing and fidgeting, "I think that's just natural for him... I remember Francis doing it whenever no one else was around... He said they just did that after he got beheaded..."

"What?!" Arthur asked, staring at him and going pale. "But-but this is a child...! His head should no longer have gotten beheaded!" He could feel his knees starting to go weak as he imagined this one year old child's head cut off. Oh, God...

He swallowed and shook himself, looking at Francis sadly. "... If this is natural for him," he started out quietly, "Then how am I supposed to get him to see straight...?"

Alfred stepped forward and inspected Francis. Thinking about it for a moment, he then closed his eyes, smiled softly, and then opened them and offered cheerily, "I'll just pay to have it surgically looked at! I'm sure my eye doctor knows how to cure lazy eye!"

Arthur gaped at him for a second before shutting his mouth shut. Obviously he was going to have it looked at himself, but it was nice of Alfred to offer... but this raised another question.

"Alfred," he said seriously, staring into his eyes to find answers. "Why are you helping me? You weren't there when I cast that bloody spell, and yet you..."

He saw Alfred's cheery, bumbling, some would say "stupid" look fade into a serious one. This one seemed more... Real. It gave off a vibe of level headedness, slight sarcasm, and other emotions he never expected Alfred to have all the time...

Which begged the question: why didn't he bring this side of himself out more?

Gazing deeply into Arthur's eyes, he explained gently, "I didn't want to see your polished reputation just collapse on itself from this..." he swallowed, "So I want to take the fall - we're friends after all, any friend would do that for another..." He then bit his lip, "And, to be honest... Seeing Francis that helpless, and everyone not wanting him - Hell," he tousled his hair, "Did any of us really like him? But to see you act all responsible..." he slipped his glasses off and continued, "To see you put yourself out on the line for someone no one else wants or loves... Is really inspiring," he slipped his specs back on, "And I want to be a good friend, and help you- help you both with this."

Arthur felt a shiver run through him at his words. It was true, wasn't it... no one else really liked him, and... didn't want him, not like this, and possibly not ever.

He gave a small smile at him. "... Thank you, Alfred..." He swallowed and laughed a little. "Really, thank you..." Words could not express how grateful he was right now; he had been expecting everyone to hate him after they found out what he had done to Francis. He had certainly never imagined anyone to offer to help him! But this was good, this was very good...

Alfred gave a calm smile and nodded, eyes connecting with Arthur's as in a sort of... Warm, pleasant look. To which Alfred felt his heartbeat pick up pace suspiciously... Yet he wasn't sure why...

He didn't have time to linger on it though, when they saw Francis shyly reach a hand out to the American, a look of fear in his crossed eyes, as he shivered and shook in Arthur's arms.

Arthur quickly coddled him and whispered soothingly. "That's Alfred - he's nice, and he's going to help take care of you..." He reached over and gently took Alfred's hand, pulling it lightly over to Francis'. "Nice - bien..."

Alfred cleared his throat and started to speak in clear, crisp French to the young child, reassuring him calmly that he wouldn't hurt him. At that, Francis completely relaxed and hugged Alfred's hand, nuzzling it and crying happy tears. Finally someone was managing to make since to the poor boy!

Arthur blinked at him. "You... speak perfect French?!" He smiled a little and gripped his hand tighter. "Alfred, please, teach me...!" Any form of pretense he had was gone - he was fully in parent mode. Which included doing things he wouldn't normally be caught dead doing, like almost begging someone to teach him how to speak French, nor appearing so... vulnerable in front of someone else. Especially Alfred.

Alfred flicked his eyes over to him and gave a look of amusement. Hey! He was the mixing pot of cultures- he knew a few things or two about languages~

Which he proceeded to show off by talking to Arthur in Italian, then German, Russian, Arabic, Indian, Spanish, a few others, then finishing with English and answering with a smooth chuckle, "I'd love to teach you French- the poor little guy keeps thinking you want him to become a chicken with how broken your French is!"

Arthur blushed bright red and looked down at the floor. "H-hey...! I tried!" It wasn't his fault he didn't know so many languages, was it...? And, and he had thought he was pronouncing the words right...

Alfred just gave a smile full of endearment and padded over. Leaning over, he sandwich hugged Francis between them and decided to ask with a saddened look, "So... I really do want to help you- a-and," he then looked sheepish, "I hope this isn't too... Uncomfortable, but could I stay at your house alternating every week so that way Francis will get the feeling he has two parents and not just once?" he looked away, his face heating up for some reason, "It's better for the child that way- and your stress levels..."

Arthur bit at his lip nervously and nodded. He almost felt like suggesting he just stick around 24/7, since that would definitely be best for Francis at this point, but he knew that was being selfish... Alfred was already volunteering his time - he didn't have the right to take more away.

"That sounds good, thank you..." He smiled and hugged them both back, leaning down to kiss Francis' forehead and laugh a little. If he got any more emotional, he'd start crying. "Thank you..."

Alfred's face melted into a warm, loving smile as he did something odd: he leaned in and kissed Arthur on the cheek- for no reason it felt like, for both of them...

"You're always welcome Arthur," he smiled kindly after that, "It's what any friend would do-"

"Hallo?! England! America! The meeting is starting!" Germany barked through the door at them, causing Francis to shiver more and curl up in Arthur's arms, becoming dead silent, "Get out here, ja?!"

"A-ah, yes!" Arthur seemed just a little flustered by the kiss, no matter how friendly. He had never really imagined Alfred as the type to do something like that... Nevertheless, he held Francis tighter and rubbed his hair soothingly to get him to calm down as he led the way out. "Keep your lederhosen on!"

Germany growled at that and stalked away from the door. Alfred gave a snicker and ruffled Francis's hair, before turning and opening the door for them, "After you, baby Daddy~" He teased with a playful smile.

Arthur pouted a little and stuck his tongue out at him. In a sort of quick retaliation, he said, "Ah ah, mommy's first~"

Alfred blinked in surprise, before smiling softly and chuckling, "I like it, Daddy~" he winked at the other, looking rather... Smooth, and on top of things... Incredibly suave...

Which was what Alfred, never, seemed to act like! So what was going on?!

Arthur didn't get an answer as Francis yawned, his stomach growling a bit. Luckily Arthur had purchased formula...

"Hold on, dear," Arthur mumbled as he fumbled around in one of the baby carrier pockets before taking out a bottle. He handed it to Francis and gently put the nozzle into Francis' mouth before walking back, smiling a little at Alfred. "Thanks again," he said just before taking his seat.

Francis seemed incredibly content as he suckled on the bottle, his crossed eyes starting to slip shut... Till he heard the door crash open, and an energetic Scotsman start to announce his entrance... With a poor, rather "mild mannered" Canadian following after him...

And all the noise caused Francis to stop suckling, and start crying in fear from how loud this stranger was!

"Everyone!" the excitable, red-headed personification of Scotland exclaimed, grinning at them all. "Ya won' believe wha' I jus' saw!"

"Scot," Arthur growled, eye twitching. "Please leave." It was no secret that he didn't like his brother in the slightest. No one really knew why - Arthur never liked to talk about it and Scot always joked it off as "sibling rivalry" or something equally as harmless.

Francis started to cry more, causing Alfred to leap in alarm and take him out of the carrier and hold him close. Rocking him and humming softly, he found that it wasn't working. Coming up to Arthur, he whispered urgently, "H-He's starting to shake-"

Arthur jumped a little in surprise, a look of guilt crossing his features. Of course his anger would affect Francis... He gently took the little boy back and held him close, whispering calming words into his ear. Not that he could understand them, but still.

Arthur's complete distraction peaked Scot's interest and he wandered over. "Who's tha'?" he asked, blinking. He chuckled a bit and pat Arthur on the back, teasing, "I know ya miss bein' a parent, Artie, bu' yanno ya can' kidnap someone else's child!"

"I'm not a kidnapper!" Arthur yelled at him, immediately wincing and going back to Francis immediately, starting to rock him.

Francis shivered and peeked out curiously. However, he completely zoned out with one eye, the other rolling down lazily as he spotted Canada, or Matthew, behind Scot...

And at that moment, little Francis felt as though he was completely, and utterly connected to this "Canada," before him. The light bounce of his wavy, jaw length locks, his similar looped curl, glasses, those soft eyes-

Currently, the boy was trying to deter Scot from agitating Arthur, which didn't seem to be working as Arthur gave his brother the lowdown of what had happened.

"That's Francis?!" he exclaimed, eyes bulging out of his head.

Matthew also seemed surprised, looking over at Francis with mild fascination and confusion. That... was Francis? The country that had raised him briefly?

"Y-yes..." Arthur said, uncomfortable again. He just knew his brother was going to say something stupid.

And he did.

"If ya wanted a kid tha' badly why not jus' go git another colony?"

"I didn't mean for this to happen you idiot!"

Francis just stared at Matthew deeply, his head tilted. One eye rolled down, the other stayed focus on Matthew as he smiled softly. At the same time, his glasses, too large to fit on his face, almost fell off. This person before him looked absolutely beautiful, like an angel~

Arthur glared at his brother for a few more seconds, but then seemed to notice Francis' quiet and still demeanor. He looked down, a little surprised by the smile on his face. He tipped his glasses up before looking in the direction his ward was looking, and found Canada.

"Matthew," Arthur said, tilting his head a little. "Come here."

Matthew was surprised at being recognized, but he quickly stepped forward anyways. "Y-yes...?"

Once he got close enough, Francis latched onto the poor boy with a happy laugh, nuzzling his arm and tugging it more, This pretty man was an angel~ So soft and warm~ Which caused Francis to want to nibble at him curiously, his eyes darting about till one focused on Arthur, and the other on Matthew, Cooing happily, he leaned up and tried to kiss the "angel" before him, and managed to give him a sloppy smooch on the cheek.

Which made Matthew blink in surprise and laugh a little. He smiled at Francis warmly and tickled him with one hand. "Gootchie gootchie goo!" he cooed in baby talk, causing Arthur to smile as well.

"Francis seems to like you..." he commented. To him, this was a good thing - he was beginning to worry that Francis was scared of people...

Francis laughed and tried to grab at Matthew's hand, looking incredibly happy and comfortable in the other's hold. His small hands managed to tug gently at the other's hair at least. This caused Alfred some amusement as he watched beside Arthur, "They're pretty cute together, doing stuff like that~"

"Yes, they do," Arthur said, looking at them fondly. He liked seeing Francis smile like that - one-year-old's should smile like that! And laugh, all bubbly...

Arthur sighed a little and turned to Alfred with a grin. "Maybe I should ask Matthew to help raise him~" he said offhandedly, though it was still a little teasing.

Alfred felt himself pale and start to whine softly, "Oh come on! I don't want Francis having a maple addiction at the age of four like Matt here!"

Francis seemed to be thrilled at anything having to do with Matthew as he giggled more and tugged at the other's hair gently, wanting to put it in his mouth. It looked like tasty pasta noodles or something!

"Hey!" Matthew protested, albeit however quiet, looking over at Alfred with a pout. "I did not, and do not, have a maple addiction...!"

Arthur still just couldn't take his eyes off of Francis. Why was he so enthralled by Matthew...? Perhaps he liked the boy's quiet nature, or simply how he looked? Looking Matthew over, he could see how he would be considered handsome. Perhaps France had liked him before...?

Alfred smirked and started to tease him while Francis just stared up at Matthew with one eye, and kept his other one trained on Arthur. And both looks held one of an odd curiosity that the Brit couldn't shake... One he had felt he had seen from the other before, only under much... Darker circumstances...

He shook his head, not wanting to think about that. This was a new France... he had no relations to the old one except for his looks, and this eye trouble he seemed to have...

Arthur set his jaw in promise. This time around, he would not have such creepy tendencies... He would make him feel loved, and, and he'd have a normal development, with human friends in human schools... Until he became mature enough for Arthur to tell him about his being a country.

He heard a yawn as Francis gave him a tired look with both eyes and held out his arms. He also seemed expectant, tilting his head and wanting the other to pick him up now. Arthur also heard his stomach growl again, remembering the fact that Francis was severely under fed for some... Odd reason...

Arthur smiled fondly at him and picked him up to hold, also grabbing the bottle again and putting it in his mouth. "Eat up, Francis, please... Okay?" He chewed at his lip and looked at Alfred. "We need to start those French lessons soon, if you don't mind..."

Matthew raised a brow at Alfred. He was teaching French? He would say he knew it better...

Alfred gave a prideful smirk at his brother and nodded, "Yeah, I can speak French- and proper French, unlike you, brother~"

Francis suckled enthusiastically on his bottle for a few minutes, before giving a dissatisfied look and stopping, with an almost pout like expression on his face.

"I speak proper French!" Matthew argued, frowning. "I speak the French that France taught me...!"

"Oh, what's wrong...?" Arthur said quietly to his toddler. "Do you not like the taste? I tried to get some French formula back in Paris..."

Alfred snickered and rolled his eyes, "You sure your girl friend was teaching you everything~?"

Francis poured more and pushed the bottle away, just staring silently up at Arthur. He looked rather.. On edge...

Arthur frowned. "Francis, what's wrong...?" He didn't even notice Matthew's slightly louder cry of, "He wasn't my girlfriend...! And yes!"

Francis teared up, and started to shake and cry.

Alfred smirked and was about to say something, when he whipped around at the crying, wanting to tend to Francis quickly.

Arthur started rocking him, frowning. "Francis, love, what's wrong?!" He ground his teeth. He felt totally helpless - he couldn't communicate with Francis, he couldn't understand what was wrong, he couldn't do anything...! Was he really so out of practice?! Well, he supposed he had never dealt with a one-year-old...

Matthew also inspected the crying baby and gave him a gentle smile before starting to sing a soft, French song that Papa France had sung to him when he had been fidgety.

Francis calmed down immediately and closed his eyes, smiling softly. That was the voice of a beautiful angel ringing in his ears~

Giving a blissful sigh, he started to fall asleep, hugging Arthur tightly.

Arthur smiled and looked up at Matthew gratefully. "Thank you so much!"

"No problem," Matthew smiled at the new Father. "If you want, I could give you the music sheets for the song - pronunciation might be a little rocky at first, but..."

"That would be wonderful, thank you..." Arthur smiled up at him and said, "And please, feel free to visit as often as you like!"

Matthew beamed. "I may take you up on that!"

And with that, the meeting went off without much of a hitch... Till people decide they wanted to crowd about the baby carrier and gossip excitedly to one another about how they were glad Francis couldn't speak yet..

Which made Arthur stand up abruptly and grab his baby carrier. "If all we're going to be doing is idle gossip," he said, tone biting as he glared at everyone. "I'm leaving. Meeting adjourned." He left quickly through the door, feeling anger burn inside him. How could they all be so mean to a child?! It didn't matter if it was France anymore - the fact of the matter was that even if they didn't like the old France, that didn't give them any right to be mean to this one!

Wasn't he proof of that?

Francis didn't stir as the other carried him out, a small smile on his pale rose lips. He seemed to be wonderfully unaware of the things going on around him.

Before Arthur fully left though, he heard the door shut and quick steps follow him, "That was really awesome what you said out there, Arthur."

He snorted a bit and turned to give Alfred a frown. "I didn't say much - just mentioned gossip again." He sighed. "Why does this group have such a problem with that? We should be better than such petty things..." He winced and looked down at Francis. Really, he should have been better than to stoop to something so petty...

Alfred gave a weak smile and adjusted his carry on bag, "Well... I guess you're right... They are being really... Stupid," he sighed and shrugged, "But hey, we usually all hate each other but..." he gave a sad look, "I sorta miss France... He was fun sometimes..."

Arthur felt a sort of dull pain coarse through him. Fun? Could he say France was fun? He had always hated him, he thought, though there were the times they got along...

"You know what I hate the most about all this?" Arthur said quietly, lost in his own thoughts. "It's that, half the time I couldn't remember... if it was me who hated France, or just my people..."

Alfred winced at that and looked away, "I think that's something you'll have to decide for yourself eventually..." eyes trailing down as he looked away, he noticed a little pink book in Arthur's bag. Raising a confused brow, he reached forward and took it out, asking, "Hey... What's this?"

"What -? Oh..." Arthur picked it up and handed it to him. "I was looking through France's mansion for some glasses, and I found this..." He chewed at his lip. "I presume it's his diary, though I haven't read it yet..." Honestly, he felt like it was an invasion of privacy. And no matter how much he hated France, he didn't want to do that...

Alfred's eyes lit up as he noticed the key. Without thinking, he jammed it into the lock, unlocked the book, and opened it... While not expecting a little piece of paper to pop out in front of him.

Giving a gasp of surprise, he about toppled forward as he grasped the paper blindly and opened it to take a look. Reading it, he slowly paled and gave a weary stare, turning to Arthur and handing it to him, "You might... Want to read his well, "her" diary after all.."

Arthur frowned and took the piece of paper, his hand a little shaky. "What do you mean...?"

"To all of whom this may concern, this is only the first diary of my new life... In previous ones, I refer to myself as a male. This is no longer accurate, as I have decided to remake myself into the image of what I desire to be: a girl, so I hope this will not cause too much confusion.

And also at the time of this note, I have proceeded to hopefully kill myself once and for all. One can only dream, oui?

~ Love, François Alphonsine Bonnefoy, the Republic of France."

Author's note, TheGuardianKnux: Greetings, fellow readers. ^^ If you have any questions feel free to ask me through a PM message, and I shall be sure to answer them. Sorta, kinda, maybe, NOT. :D

AN Annzy B.: XDD Okay, while SHE may not answer the questions, I will! So feel free to shoot me a PM! ^^ (Though with my busy schedule I may not be able to reply for a while... you won't believe how many messages I get/have OTL)  
Knux: But I don't have any! So send them to me, because all I do is text and play Animal Crossing New Leaf all day like a yahoo! :D

Annzy: OOH! OOH! Also, if you have any ideas for this story, I'd love to hear them... XD  
Knux: But any complaints can go to Annzysnotrealemail !

Annzy: JUST LOOK FORWARD TO THE THINGS TO COME, READERS~ There's some awesome, fluffy stuff mixed with angst ;)  
Knux: Or porn. Yeah, there's lots of shagging and sex and stuff. Maybe not, am I really a reliable source? Possibly. :D

**Annzy: … If you know me you know I don't do porn - SO BYE!  
AND REVIEW, GOSH DARN IT TO HECK! **


	3. Hidden Depths and Kept Secrets

...

What had he just read?

Arthur felt shaken; physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually - any "lly" you could think of! His eyes zoned in and out at the paper, focusing on one phrase in particular: "I have proceeded to hopefully kill myself for one and for all." Kill. Himself. Suicide. France was suicidal? He didn't seem the type - he loved himself too much.

... Right?

He blinked back tears. Even through all of his confusion, his pride of not crying in front of others still remained as he folded up the note quietly.

He felt Alfred put a hand on his shoulder and give him half a hug, "Sorry... I-I," he swallowed and gave a pained look down at the ground, "I know it's hard to read something like that- and I know you hate feeling ready to cry-"

"I'm not ready to cry," he said monotonously, echoing how empty he felt inside. "I'm just tired. Very tired. I should get home..." He looked down at the diary, his hands itching to open it up and read everything right then and there.

Alfred bit his lip and offered, "Want me to drive so you can look at it more?" he seemed a bit sheepish asking that, but he did want Arthur to find some more answers... Something wasn't adding up to what they knew about Francis, but he wasn't exactly sure what.  
Obviously, apparent transexuality was one but... There was starting to be other things... Holes in a man, or woman's previously "spotless" outward mental health, while questionable, was starting to show signs of... Concern...

"I can't ask you to do that..." Arthur said quietly, avoiding his gaze and turning to fasten Francis into the baby car seat he had bought earlier. "You must have better things to do, paperwork, or some new video game..." Even like this he could mutter a snide joke/insult. He was a little proud of himself.

That pride quickly cracked as he looked at the sleeping boy in the car. He... he had so many more problems than he had thought... Flashes of what he had seen in Francis' mansion rooms appeared in his mind, making his hands stumble a bit on one of the buckles. So much death... so many problems... How had he dealt with it?

... Obviously, he hadn't, if he had wanted to die.

Alfred raised an unamused brow and deadpanned, "Gee, way to act like a hypocrite and make a petty remark while panning those who do so to someone who technically isn't your child," rolling his eyes, he got into the driver's side, "Just go and read the book- we both know you want to, and technically, it's mostly your business now."

Those despite all the darkness that was starting to loom and seep into the corners of Arthur's mind, filling him with worry and dread, Francis looked incredibly peaceful and happy at the moment.

"How is it petty?" Arthur asked after a second, looking into Alfred's eyes with the same emptiness as before. "You were even playing a videogame before the meeting... And get out of the bloody car - do you even know how to drive in my country without getting in an accident?"

He finished buckling Francis up, and despite all of his taunting, he quietly got into the passenger's seat and stared at the pink, bound book on his lap.

Alfred rolled his eyes and decided to note, his voice laced with slight amusement, "I said it was petty because you decided to take a random jab at something I was doing that I haven't gotten to do often because I've been over worked like some sort of animal for the past month," he raised a brow, "I tend not to get breaks when mad bombers from Eastern Europe try to blow up Boston, thanks for asking."

The book stared back at Arthur- if you could say that. It's pages looked rather tempting to leaf through...

But however tempting it may be, he winced at Alfred's words and felt like crying again. "Right." He spoke quietly, obviously trying to conceal his emotions. "I'm sorry. Really, I am..." Sometimes he really hated how popular America was - not a petty jealousy, just a pure hatred... Because with that popularity came people wanting to destroy him, and take over.

Arthur could remember days when he was so mad at other countries for targeting America, his previous colony, that he destroyed some of the beautiful furniture in his house. But, afterwards, he had to remind himself that he wasn't much better...

War of American Independence, anyone? It only happened because he couldn't let go...

Alfred shrugged and drove through the street comfortably, "Hey- I'm use to terrorists now," he sighed softly, "Since I get to hear about 9/11 about every damn day of my life, I'm not scared of the Taliban or whatever the Hell they are now..." he yawned, "I kinda don't care anymore- I'll end up outliving them anyways..." shaking his head, he looked over at Arthur sympathetically, "Anyways, do you have a plan for how we're gonna raise Francis here or...?"

Arthur smiled a little; finally, a little flickering of emotion crossed his face! And it was amused, too, which was good. "Don't you remember how I raised you?" he said with a chuckle. "It'll be like that, only..." He frowned and looked away, feeling guilty. "I'll be more involved..." He had always regretted having to leave America so often, but he had a country to run himself; his own problems to deal with... and communication and transport had not been as advanced back then.

"Well, I remember you oppressing my human liberties and making a lot of people pissed off~" Alfred teased with an amused smile, turning over and flicking Arthur just to bug him, "And you wouldn't get me a pony for Christmas! That was the worse-!"

Before he could finish his sentence, they heard a small yawn and Francis babble out, "Coa! Coa!"

Arthur abandoned any guilt he felt nor snide comebacks that came to mind as he turned his full attention to Francis, smiling a little. "Coa?" he tried to copy the sound.

"Coa!" Francis chirped, giggling and gazing at him, his eyes /uncrossed/ this time around, "Coa! Coa!"

Arthur heard Alfred start to laugh warmly, noticing the other was highly amused.

"What is he saying?" Arthur asked, smiling a little. He had assumed it was just baby talk, but if it was amusing Alfred so much, it must mean something.

Alfred chuckled and kept his eyes on the road, explaining kindly, "He's trying to sound like a frog in French- instead of "ribbet" it's "coa."

Arthur laughed. "What nonsense..." He smiled at Francis and actively tried to copy the sound towards, trying to sound like a frog and laughing; he thought he sounded ridiculous.

Francis laughed more at that, giving a happy grin. His laugh was rather precious to be honest- all light, melodic and gentle, like waves on the ocean...

Arthur laughed a little more and smiled at him, then he remembered something important: "Oh, Alfred," he turned to look at him. "We need to stop by the store for more baby food - for some reason he's rejected the formula I've bought him..."

Alfred gave a curious look and nodded, ready to make a turn, "Kay dude, though I wouldn't know why..." he glanced over and saw the diary again, "Hey, why don't I go in for ya- you should really be readin' that book..."

Arthur frowned a little and rubbed the back of his head, looking down. "I don't know... Should I really be reading it? Diaries are private things..." He looked at the pink book. "I'm not so sure if... Besides," he smiled at him a little. "I think Francis should pick his own formula - he seems smarter than a normal one year old, maybe he'll know which one he likes..."

"You know why can't just shuffle old stuff of the past away..." Alfred frowned, gripping the steering wheel, "If you read it.. Then maybe we can figure out how to prevent Francis from well... Let's face it," he sighed, "Looking like he's about to jump someone for having parts-"

Which was a very, very bad thing to say, since he had insinuated that Arthur's child could be anything less than an angel under his care...

"He's one year old!" Arthur snarled at him, glaring and clenching his teeth. "He's not the same France anymore! He won't have those problems...! And even if he does I'll get him the proper care he needs!"

Alfred shivered and pulled into the parking lot, a look of guilt crossing his features, "I-I'm sorry..." he mumbled sheepishly, "I-I guess I can't help looking at him and noticing those same... Blue eyes... Just a heck of a lot more innocent now..."

"Yes, I suppose it's been awhile since I've seen innocent, blue eyes," Arthur snapped, unbuckling and getting out of the car, slamming his door shut. He opened up the back seat door and started to unbuckle Francis, giving him a small smile. This was a little child... He was innocent, and had so much potential - no matter what anyone else thought.

Francis cooed and reached out for him expectantly. His eyes shined as he managed to grab at Arthur's hair and tug at it gently. It was if he was trying to be curious, but also polite, "Coa!"

Arthur laughed a little, gently taking his hand in his and smiled warmly at him. He finished unbuckling his seat and picked him up, giving Alfred a frown before saying, "You can come with or you can read that bloo - ... book that you're so fond of."

Francis immediately latched on and nuzzled his neck, his shivering starting to calm down.. He seemed to be much more relaxed when Arthur held him...

Alfred winced and got out, trailing behind them at a slight distance, "Sorry..."

Arthur held Francis tight and kissed his forehead before looking back at Alfred. After a second, he smiled a little. "... It's okay." He was quiet, but it was obvious he had forgiven him fairly quickly, which was odd... Arthur could usually hold a grudge for centuries. Guess the presence of a little child changed him already...

Alfred smiled slightly and walked up beside them, leaning over and kissing Francis on the cheek, "Heheh... Yeah..."

Francis smiled and giggled slightly. He then decided to focus on Arthur as he tilted his head and gazed up into the other's eyes, one of his own sliding down and gazing at the ground, the other focusing on his "Father."

Arthur smiled weakly at him, reminding himself that he still had to get his eyes checked out... "Um, Alfred," he looked up at him. "Maybe we should just take him to one of my eye doctors today - I don't think we should wait..."

Alfred noticed the eyes in different directions and nodded, frowning, "Yeah... It's lookin' pretty bad..." he gave his best encouraging smile and offered, "Well hey, it's not as bad as the time I watched him pop it out..."

Arthur paled, staring at him with wide eyes, his grip instinctively tightening on Francis. "Wh-what? Pop out...?!" He looked down at his little baby and had to try hard not to imagine that...

Alfred gave a sheepish look and nodded slowly, "Yeah... He did it one time to scare me when he was over, I freaked out, blacked out, and when I woke up it was back in and he had eaten a spider..." He shook himself, "It was a really long night..."

Francis giggled and began to try and eat Arthur's hair, tugging at it and nibbling at it with a smile.

Which made Arthur smile just a bit as he asked, "Why did you hang out with him so much...?" He was simply curious; it had sounded like Alfred didn't really like Francis much either...

Alfred shrugged and noted, "He always seemed available anytime I asked- and the way he answered the phone..." He gave a slightly sad frown, "It seemed like not many people called him... And he was kinda lonely, so when he would come over he'd bring a lot of little treats for me..." He scrunched his nose, "Which was odd because he's always been pretty rail thin... And when we ate he wouldn't ever eat much and always go to the bathroom right afterwards-"

"Hm..." Arthur looked thoughtful. "Do you suppose he wanted to keep up his "skinny" appearance...?" He frowned a little. Hearing this was a little disheartening... Why wouldn't he eat a lot, and then...

"... Do you think he threw up his food?" Arthur asked, turning to look at Alfred with sad eyes.

Alfred shivered and looked away, a bit disheartened...

"Yeah... That sounds about right..." this caused him to tear up a bit... He had complimented the other on his weight once out of jealousy and joked about his thighs, and remembered the other looking scared and hurt...

Arthur shivered and looked down at the baby boy in his arms. "Well... We don't need to worry about that anymore... I'll make sure Francis doesn't have these problems again..."

"You won't control him though... " Alfred looked away with a hollow look, "Will you? He deserves to grow as a person again..."

Francis giggled and tugged at Arthur's fingers curiously, till he tried to bite them.

"Of course I won't control him...!" Arthur said, gently tugging his fingers out and telling him quietly, "No no - don't bite people, Francis, okay? I'll buy you a teething ring."

Francis pouted and gave a little growl, snapping at the other and trying to bite him again, "Coa!"

Arthur frowned and chastised him, "No biting!"

Francis turned up and hissed viciously at him, snapping and trying to bite the other again with a snarl.

Arthur held Francis up above his head from under his arms and gave him a stern look. "No. Biting."

Francis gave him a skeptical look in return and rolled his eyes at the other. He then stuck his tongue out a blew a raspberry, "Mwahahah!"

Arthur raised a brow at him before finally making it in the store. He set him down in one of the carts, the one with the seat option, and started pushing him through the store. Before all that, though, he grabbed one of Francis' hands in his and said, "How would you like it if someone bit your finger...?"

Francis looked up at him, and then giggled, barring a pair of.. Wait, were those fangs?! Small cute little fangs, and then trying to bite the other again with a small growl of happiness.

"Wh-what...?!" Arthur stared at him in shock before holding his mouth open with one hand. "Maybe we should take him to a dentist today, too..."

Till he saw a forked tongue pop out and try to lick the other's hand...

Which Alfred saw, causing him to raise a brow and note, "That usually isn't normal... Is it?"

"Not normal at all.." Arthur started paling. Was there another side effect to his spell-gone-wrong?! Why the hell did he have a snake tongue...!

Francis giggled and curled his tongue around one of Arthur's fingers...

Causing Alfred to feel a bit... Sick... Was Francis at one point a snake... Thing... In the past? He would have remembered that!

Arthur swallowed and managed to smile a little at this new development. After all, he didn't want Francis to become discouraged... "Do I taste good...?" he asked, a little amused. Inside he felt incredibly sick, though he tried to hide it.

Taking a deep breath, he looked over at Alfred. "... Okay," he said quietly, "I need to read that diary..."

Francis nodded and retracted his tongue, turning it back to normal, and doing the same to his fangs. He looked incredibly pleased as his eyes crossed and he giggled again.

Alfred gave an agreeing nod and slipped him the book, "I'd say I told you so, but I really don't wanna make you made today- you look really tired..."

He laughed softly and took the book. "Very..." he agreed as he started to flip to the front page. "Um... Can you push the cart?" he looked a little sheepish as he asked it.

Alfred nodded and took to steering the cart as Arthur began to read the first page:

Dear Diary,

Well, I suppose silicone looks rather tacky in terms of breasts, but I guess it's a great way to start before I decide to get the real deal! I'm feeling really hopeful about becoming what I want to be! Since that spell.. Really didn't work, I'm sure human surgeries can!

So.. François... I suppose it sort of has a nice ring to it doesn't it... Not too different from Francis, but different enough that I can put the past behind and become female... Something I've been wishing for for a long time, but too shy to actually do..

But that being said, I'm really scared, diary... A lot of people already don't like me- I've tried starving though so maybe it's been my weight! Oooo! I always knew being almost six foot and not 110 wasn't a good thing! but it's better now! I've gotten down to a nice 105.76! Now just ten more pounds to go!

Je 'taime, François B~

**Read and Review~ :D**


	4. Identity in Pink

Arthur felt even more sick after reading the first page. So many problems jumped out just through the few paragraphs: gender identity crisis, low self-esteem, anorexia/bulimia...

Although, now that he thought about it... France was right, too - a lot of people /don't/ like him... Maybe if they had, he wouldn't have felt this way about himself.

And what was this about a spell? What spell had he tried to perform...? When had he gone through this stage, anyways... He couldn't remember France ever wearing fake breasts...

He saw the next page before him this one... Darker, then before.

Dear Diary... I want to try them today- I bought a cute sundress and everything... But I'm afraid to go out in front of the other nations and show them.. I don't want them to tear me down more... Dear diary, why does... Does...

Never mind... I tried them on around the house and loved them... I just wish they were real... So I wouldn't have to feel disgusted with how hideous I really look... But maybe one day... I don't know...

❤ François~

Arthur felt himself shiver as he re-read all of the words. He was so afraid... so terrified of what everyone else thought. But it didn't seem like he cared when he /was/ in public... Though, he had to admit that despite how crazy it drove France... he, or she, probably made the right decision in not showing the other nations his, her, sundress...

They probably would have torn "her" down and made her feel worse...

He heard Francis giggle when they went past a few dresses, the young boy reaching out for one and bouncing excitedly.

"W-would you like one?" Arthur said, blinking back tears and taking the one he was grabbing for, handing it to him. "Would you... like this?" he asked again, smiling, though it was a little forced... But, the way he figured it... If Francis wanted to be a girl, then he might as well just get a head start on it.

Francis beamed and nodded, tugging at it and trying to hug the dress. It looked so colorful and pretty like Mama's clothes!

Alfred raised a brow. Leaning in, he wiped Arthur's tears away gently and whispered, "What did it say?"

"He wants to be a girl..." Arthur said quietly, turning his head away. He couldn't believe he had cried in front of Alfred... "He wanted to be one very badly, but was too afraid that everyone would hate him more... So... So I'm going to make sure the others won't hate him, her, for that..."

Alfred's eyes widened. He sort of suspected it when he saw Francis change in front of him and was wearing women's underwear but...

Shaking his head, he leaned down and hugged Francis, asking him softly, "Do you want to be a little girl?"

Francis looked up in surprise and asked in confusion, "I am one, Oui?"

"What did he say?" Arthur said, frowning a little. Damn it, he needed to learn French now!

Alfred looked up and explained, "He asked me, "But I am a girl, aren't I?" so I told him," he swallowed and looked away, "That he is."

Arthur blinked at him, swallowing again. "... G-good..." he said quietly, gripping the cart tightly and smiling down at Francis. "I-if that's what... she wants... then... then who am I to..." He hung his head down, his other hand moving to cover his eyes. God, he was so not ready for this... How did Francis even get it in his head that he's a girl?!

Francis tilted his head and reached out. Shakily, he grasped Arthur's hand and tried to pull it down with both of his, babbling sadly. He didn't like to see Papa sad... It hurt his heart...

Alfred frowned and hugged Arthur, causing his heart to race. He was still confused as to why, but he put his questions aside and rubbed the other's back comfortingly, "You're doing great, Arthur," he whispered softly, "Don't be sad-"

"I'm doing great?!" he echoed, his voice quiet yet jam-packed with emotion. "I turned France into a babbling brook of a toddler who has some kind of eye and teeth and /tongue/ problem, and who wants to be a girl and I'm doing great...!" He laughed softly and felt like crumpling to the floor. What was he doing - he was being ridiculous... Sure, there was a lot to handle here, but it was nothing compared to war, was it?

... Just, more personal...

Francis bursted into tears and curled up, shaking and shivering like a leaf at that.

Alfred gave a disapproving look and shook himself. Arthur had a point to be upset... But at Francis's expense?

Arthur seemed to realize Francis then, and quickly wiped at his tears before reaching to hug him close, muttering comforting, calm words. Damn it - he had always tried so hard never to cry in front of Alfred when he was small, and just look at the great British nation now... Maybe he wasn't fit to raise a child anymore...

But even if that were true? Would anyone really take Francis in? Humans wouldn't be able to raise a nation... And none of the others wanted his poor, baby... "girl"...

He heard Francis stop his wailing and just tremble more, becoming silent.

He sniffled a little and smiled wearily at Francis, kissing his forehead again. "I'll buy you the dress..." he said softly. "My little girl..."

Francis peered up and gave a nod, still trembling and looking incredibly frightened... As if the other was going to hit him...

But he didn't, instead just putting him back in the cart and moving to stroke his cheek. He took a deep breath and gave a convincing smile, telling himself that everything would be all right... So, Francis, well, Francois he supposed, wanted to be a girl... He could do that. He had always wondered what it'd be like raising a little girl, anyways.

... But wait, he'd still have a boy's body...

Francis started to calm down as he leaned into Arthur's touch. Smiling warmly, he closed his eyes and started to hum softly.

Alfred took a deep breath and blew it out. Suddenly, he slipped a hand over Arthur's and squeezed it, "You're doing fine... François will be fine..."

Arthur jolted a little from his hand and turned to look at him, blinking as if dazed. "... Fran... swah?" The pronunciation came out a little wrong and he creased his eyebrows together. "How do you pronounce that?"

Alfred chuckled and caressed the other's hand unknowingly, "Yeah- that's pretty close," he smiled softly, "When we put him to bed tonight I'll teach you how to make it better!"

"Okay..." He looked back at Francis and smiled at him, finally noticing Alfred's hand. "... Um, what are you doing...?"

Alfred blinked and then blushed more. Looking away, he removed his hand and mumbled, "Sorry for being all weird..."

Francis reached a hand forward and tugged Arthur's hand towards him. Getting it close, he nuzzled against it and hugged it like a stuffed animal.

Which made Arthur smile warmly at him and forget all about Alfred as he laughed. "Oh, you're so cute~!" He cooed, pushing his hand back against his cheek gently and reaching up to hold the other side of his face with his other hand.

Francis cooed softly and closed his eyes softly. He nuzzled the other's hands, opening his glassy baby blues and giving the other a look of pure love and adoration, "D-Dadda?"

This froze Arthur for a minute before he started crying tears of joy. Dadda... He hadn't heard that in so long...! And it sounded so /cute/ when François said it...!

He wrapped the baby into a hug and kissed his cheek, laughing a bit. "Yes! Dadda...!"

"Dadda!" Francis repeated cheerily, hugging Arthur back, laughing and giggling like a normal child. As he hugged Arthur, he kisses his father's cheek. It was a sloppy and wet kiss, but precious none the less.

At least, that's what Alfred thought as he smiled softly and watched their embrace.

Father and... daughter stayed like that for a while, until Arthur smiled at Francis one last time and set him back in the cart. "Come along, we still have to get your food, and a teething ring...!" He pushed along again, almost forgetting Alfred was even there...

Alfred gave a sheepish look, feeling like Matthew at that moment: forgotten...

Following after them, he asked Arthur, "Want me to get a few cute dresses for our pretty little girl?"

Arthur turned to look at him, the expression on his face revealing that he really /had/ forgotten about him. "Oh! Yes, that would probably be good - thank you!" He smiled at him, a thankful, friendly smile that he rarely saw from Arthur. Though it seemed to appear a lot more lately.

Alfred felt himself glow somehow from that look and he beamed and nodded, "Okay- I'll pick him up a stuffed animal while I do!"

Francis seemed content at the moment with hugging Arthur's free hand. Nuzzling each digit, he mumbled lovingly, "Dadda..."

"Thank you, Alfred..." he said before looking back down at Francis and smiling lovingly. "Yes, dadda... Trés bien... Oh, I hope I said that right..."

Francis blinked his eyes up at him slowly and started to nibble gently a the other's fingers, "Oui."

Arthur blinked at him and smiled. "Thank you..." He chuckled a bit to himself before going off into the baby food section, looking at all the different brands and formulas there were and wondering which one he should get... How did anyone ever choose?

Francis gazed at them intently, eyes scanning them. Suddenly, he tried to take one down, one that was rather close to breast milk of all things...

"This one?" Arthur asked, picking it up and holding it out to him. "Do you think you'd like this one...?" Yes, he realized how ridiculous it was to ask him that since he was one year old and couldn't exactly taste the sample right now... But hey, he seemed to know what he wanted so far.

Francis gave a nod, gazing deeply into Arthur's eyes, "Oui!" he then looked around a bit, till turning his sights back to Arthur, "Dadda!"

Arthur smiled a little and put three six-bottle packages of the formula in the cart. "Yes, Dadda..." He chuckled a bit and carried on to the "toys" section, though to the teething rings in particular. "Which one?" he asked, smiling down at him.

Francis blinked up at them and then pointed to the girliest, pinkest one that had little squids on it, "That!"

Arthur blinked at it before chuckling a bit and picking it out. "All right, all right..." He pointed at one of the squids that had especially wide eyes and tried to imitate it's face to make Francis laugh. "Do I look like a squid?"

Francis started to laugh and nodded, "Oui!" and made the same face, trying to grasp for the teething ring.

Arthur handed it to him with a chuckle. Hey, they were going to pay for it anyway, so why not? It would stop him from chewing on fingers, at least. He went out of the aisle and headed back towards the dresses to find Alfred. He hoped the American hadn't gone overboard with the clothes... She was still going to grow - they didn't need to spend a ton of money on something she'd outgrow in a few months.

He saw Alfred picking out incredibly girly. One was pink with white ruffles, lace and bows, another one was all blue with tiny white flowers, and another-

He then looked up and blushed, smiling sheepishly, "O-Oh hey-" Arthur was going to find them stupid wasn't he... But he just wanted to make François look cute! She just seemed so helpless... And he wanted to be her hero... The same for her F-Father...

But instead of him thinking the dresses were stupid, Arthur smiled and wheeled the cart up to him, taking the pink one and chuckling a bit. "I think François will like this, oui?" He looked over at the little child with a smile and held the dress out to her.

Francis gasped in surprise, eyes widening. That was the prettiest dress he had ever seen! Grasping at it, he nodded and bounced in his seat, "Oui! Oui!"

Alfred let out a sigh of relief and gazed into Arthur's eyes now. His heart started to thump more as he saw the other smile and laugh... He looked so... Beautiful, doing that-

W-Wait what?! B-Beautiful- n-nonsense-

Blushing now, Alfred quickly tried to hide his face by bending down and putting the dresses in the cart.

Though he had obviously lost Matthew's ability not to be recognized when Arthur wrapped his arms around him in a loose hug and whispered, "Thank you..."

Alfred blushed more and gave a slightly goofy smile. Swallowing, he managed to spit out, "T-N-No thank you!"

They were torn from their small, but imminent moment when Francis tugged Alfred's arm as explained that he needed to go to the bathroom.

Which Alfred relayed to Arthur, his heart beat increasing as he gazed into the other's nice, soft green eyes-

"Ah! Alright..." He didn't seem to notice Alfred's stares as he started wheeling his little girl off to the restrooms -

... Wait...

Which bathroom should he go in? O-obviously it would be the boy's one, since he had to help him use the bathroom, right? Unless he already knew how, then he could use the girl's...

Francis whimpered and pointed at the girls room, feeling as if his bladder was going to burst.

Arthur chewed at his lip. "U-um..." Sighing, he picked Francis up and hurried into the girl's room and into one of the stalls, feeling completely embarrassed now. "D-do you need help...?"

Francis nodded, bouncing and looking increasingly uncomfortable. As he did that, he tugged at the diaper he was wearing and desperately tried to get it off.

Arthur helped him, slipping it off of him quickly and... not knowing where to go from there.

But everything ended up working in both their favors. As Francis finished his business, he looked up at Arthur and expected him to put the pull up device back on.

So he did, pulling it back up and securing it. He gave him a smile. "There we go! Good as new!" He picked him back up and strolled out of the stall, before coming face to face with a woman washing her hands... The brunette stared at him in confusion before she noticed the baby in his arms and she smiled. "Aw~" she cooed with a giggle. "You're taking your little girl in here instead of the ladies' room?"

Arthur seemed to have forgotten proper speech patterns as he mumbled incoherently, blushing as red as a stop sign. Stiffly, he walked over to help Francis wash his hands and gave a weary smile at the woman. "Y-yes..."

She giggled a little. "I can respect that!"

Francis turned and then giggled. Gazing up at the lady, he babbled and then chirped, "Bonjour!"

She blinked at Francis before smiling. "Bonjour!" She looked at Arthur in an amused fashion. "She's French?"

"U-um, well, yes..." Arthur said with an uncomfortable laugh. "Her, uh... mother, was..." He wondered if he should feel bad about calling the old France the current Francis' mother, but how else was he supposed to explain?

"Ooh~" she hummed, her tone teasing as she gave him a wink. "You like French women, hm?"

"N-not... w-well, um..."

"Where is she?" It was obvious she only asked the question to save Arthur's embarrassment.

"Oh, she, uh..." He chewed at his lip. "Isn't with us anymore..."

The woman frowned, empathy and sorrow written all over her face at the news. "Oh, I'm so sorry..."

"Oh!" Arthur gave her a gentle smile. "I-it's alright, we're doing fine... A friend of mine is helping me, so..."

"That's great!" She smiled and extended her hand. "I'm Sarah, by the way."

He shook her hand, sighing in relief. Honestly, encountering a female in the girl's bathroom could have ended in a lot worse ways. "Arthur... And this is François."

Francis nodded and blinked up curiously through the cute, red glasses he was wearing. His long, blonde lashes fluttered rapidly as tilted his head, inspecting her. Suddenly, he gave a look of distrust and turned away from her, starting to shake. Something about this woman made him feel uncomfortable and threatened...

"Ah, François...?" Arthur noticed the change immediately, and held him close to peer into his eyes. "What's wrong...?"

"Maybe you should take her out of the bathroom," Sarah suggested. "Come on, we can go out together.

"A-all right..." He followed her out of the bathroom, still looking at Francis, a little concerned. He had been smiling and laughing earlier, why was he shaking now?

Francis curled up more yet gripped Arthur's coat. Eventually, he peered up at his Father and whispered shakily, eyes wide and fearful, "Bad."

Arthur frowned. "Bad...? What's bad?" He was very confused; what could he possibly be referring to?

He saw Francis's eyes shift to Sarah as he trembled more and frowned. Something about that woman made him feel anxious...

Arthur blinked before looking at Sarah and frowning a little. It was her Francis didn't like...? But why? She seemed like a nice lady... Well, even if she was, he should probably split ways from her.

"Er, thanks for the talk," Arthur said awkwardly, holding out his hand for her to shake.

Sarah stared at it for a minute before smiling at him and taking his hand in hers. "No problem - I wish you two the best of luck..." She waved a little before walking away.

Francis immediately curled up once she left and seemed... To shut down as he became silent and just shook... But otherwise, not saying a word..

Arthur frowned a bit as he walked back to Alfred and their cart, bouncing Francis a little bit and trying to get him to smile again. "Hey, François, what's wrong...? It's just you and me, see? Smile!" He smiled a little as encouragement.

Francis just curled up again and started shaking more.

Alfred gave a puzzled look and then looked up, asking Arthur softly, "What happened in there?"

"I-we..." He frowned a little bit. "I was just talking to this woman, Sarah, in there, and he got like this..."

Alfred frowned and gazed at Francis. He then thought for a moment and suggested, "Maybe he has social anxiety..." he looked up, "I mean..." he swallowed, "Didn't France act kinda... Strange at parties? He would always press himself up against walls..." he paused for a moment, gazing into Arthur's eyes and starting to blush a bit, "And shake like he's cold..."

Arthur chewed at his lip and looked down at Francis. Alfred was right, France did seem to have anxiety at parties... Even though he threw so many - probably in an attempt to get people to like him better...

How could one, little child have so many problems already...? "Well, I'll have to help him with that, then..." How do you help social anxiety?

Alfred leaned in and hugged Francis gently, whispering comforting words and stroking his hair, "I don't know how we'll be able to help him but we can..." he blew out some more air, "You better read the rest of that diary to see what else he might.. Suffer from..."

Arthur frowned and looked down at the little baby. "I don't get it - he likes you and I just fine..." It was obvious he didn't really want to read more of that diary, but he knew he'd have to eventually...

Arthur frowned and looked down at the little baby. "I don't get it - he likes you and I just fine..." It was obvious he didn't really want to read more of that diary, but he knew he'd have to eventually...

Arthur felt a little empty not holding Francis anymore, but he smiled at the baby nonetheless as he said to Alfred, "Let's go home... He needs rest and I have so much learning to do..."

Alfred nodded and noticed Arthur's... Want to hold their child. Smiling in slight amusement, he handed Francis off to the other and pushed their cart to the checkout, "I agree- but I think you'll learn quickly."

"Really?" Arthur asked, hugging Francis tightly and smiling a little more. He chuckled and teased a little, "I suppose you would be the progression expert, hm?"

Alfred blushed and looked away sheepishly. Smiling slightly, he shrugged and placed their things onto the check out, "I-I guess so..."

Francis cooed softly and nuzzled Arthur's neck. Hugging him, he asked quietly, "L-Love moi?" he then cheered, "Moi love Dadda!"

Arthur blinked at him before tearing up. He smiled and sniffled and nuzzled his cheek against Francis'. "Y-yes! Love... I love you, François, Dadda loves vous... Don't forget it..."

The thought didn't even come to his mind how weird it was that he felt so much love for France now, whereas before... It was nothing but hate.

Francis closed his eyes and started to slip off to sleep at that, nuzzling Arthur more and whispering softly, "François... Love, Dadda..." and with that, he fell asleep, an angelic smile on his cherub face.

Arthur continued to smile at him, sighing softly. "He really is cute, you know?" he said, looking at Alfred; his eyes still had a warm, loving look to them from Francis.

Alfred misinterpreted for a second and blushed darkly. Smiling despite it, he nodded and stammered, "A-And incredibly beautiful- like an angel!"

Though now he was starting to panic inwardly and wonder if he meant that a-about Arthur...

Arthur laughed a little and nodded. "Yes, a little angel~" he agreed before reaching into his pocket to grab his wallet. "Ah, I'm sorry, what's the total...?" he looked at the cash register.

The cashier just chuckled and repeated, "It'll just be twenty quid sir."

Alfred stopped Arthur and took his wallet out, shakily handing the money over and grinning at Arthur. H-He hoped the other liked it...

"Hm...?" Arthur blinked at him with a little confusion. When he realized what he was doing, he quickly said, "Oh! You don't have to pay - you've done so much already..."

Alfred handed the money over anyways and shook his head, smiling, "A-Allow me anyways- you-you're giving me free board anyways..." he felt his heart thump even more as he gazed into those impassioned, emerald orbs-

"But..." Arthur chewed at his lip, a little uncomfortable having Alfred buy something for him. He didn't even have to be here right now - that was enough, honestly... He didn't have to buy his baby supplies for him.

Deciding he'd simply slip twenty quid into his jacket later, he shrugged. "Well, okay, if you want to..."

Alfred gave a small sigh of relief and smiled softly. Once he finished paying, he took their bags and opened the door for Arthur, a slightly blissful look in his eyes. Seeing Arthur happy was starting to feel... Really good~

Arthur smiled at him, a little amused now. "I know you like being the hero," he said with a chuckle. "But I can still open a door..."

Alfred became flustered and blushed more now. Quickly following after the other, he argued in embarrassment, "I-I wasn't- wasn't-"

"Wasn't what?" Arthur asked with a laugh. He reached his car and opened the back seat, buckling Francis inside. "You obviously just opened a door for me, correct?" His tone was amused; he didn't know why Alfred was getting so flustered, but it was definitely humorous!

Alfred rubbed the back of his head and opened the passenger door for Arthur, and then got into the driver's side, mumbling, "N-Nothing- you just seemed to have your arms full is all.."

Arthur hopped into the passenger seat, smiling over at Alfred for the millionth time that day. "Well, I suppose I did..." He chuckled a little and leaned over to buckle Alfred in. "Here, a little bit of repayment."

Alfred blushed at that and looked away shyly. That smile was really appealing...

B-but was h-he thinking that?!

To be honest.. It kind of reminded him of a talk he had had with Matthew once at the bar... The local Canadian hockey team had won, and his brother wanted to celebrate so they went out.. And the subject of Francis had come up...

"So he's being a recluse lately- weird, ain't it?" Alfred asked, taking another bite of their celebratory bacon and pancakes, "I don't know what to think!"

"It worries me, honestly..." Matthew told him, licking his lips nervously as he civilly cut his pancakes into little bite-sized pieces. "He's usually inviting people over all the time, and not as home as often as he is now... Do you think something's wrong with him?"

Alfred snorted and rolled his eyes, chopping another piece of bacon, "Please~" he shook his head, "Probably just all depressed he couldn't undress someone or molest them-"

"France isn't like that!" Matthew snapped, slamming his silverware on the table and glaring at Alfred violently. "France has never molested anyone in his entire life...!"

"How the Hell do you know, Matt?" Alfred asked with an amused chuckle, rolling his eyes and smirking at the other, "Just admit it dude- he's a weirdo, and we're not surprised he's all alone-"

"Shut up!" Matthew said fiercely, looking away and blushing a little. "I was with France for the first part of my life, remember? And he never did anything like all of you say...!"

Alfred raised a brow, "What? Do you have a Mommy complex now or something-?" he was interrupted by a hand colliding with his face though.

"I do not have a complex...!" Matthew yelled at him, his hand not even hurting from the slap he had delivered. Hey, he was tough - he had callouses on his hands from that time he had built himself a log cabin, and was a boxer, and... a few other instances. "I just... know Francis better than you, okay?" He blushed a little more and looked down. "He's always been so nice to me, and wears such a friendly smile that I love to see..." He smiled a little to himself, his bangs covering the warmth in his eyes. "It's great to see him happy, you know? And he's usually /not/ happy around all of you... so I try to cheer him up, because..." He laughed a little and looked up at Alfred, a shy smile on his face as he said quietly, "I know you'll laugh at me, and say I'm weird, too, but... I guess I'm so worried because I have a little crush on him..."

Alfred stared in amazement, clutching his cheek. Blinking slowly, he just asked quietly, "A crush.. O-on... T-That?"

Matthew scowled and looked away. "France. He's a person, Alfred, or a country, whatever!" He sighed in exasperation. "The point is, he has feelings!" He snorted and looked over at him. "I bet you've never even had a crush, have you? Your heart's never sped up around someone, and you've never felt like a complete idiot just by saying a few words... Have you ever even blushed before?" He sounded angry and annoyed as he glared at his "brother."

Alfred raises up his hands in defense. Rolling his eyes, he then rubbed his cheek, "I don't have time for girls- too prissy and shit..." he then looked down, "I'm fine being signal, you bunch of pussy willows~"

Alfred was quickly silenced when a fork came flying at him, sticking into the wall right next to his ear. Matthew was scowling at him with a dark look before reaching over to pull it out, hesitating to whisper, "Remember what number 13 had done to number 24 in the second half? That's going to happen to you if you don't shut up." He took the fork out with a "shing" sound and quietly went back to eating.

Alfred just stated and shivered a bit. Just what was Matthew's problem?! Jesus!

Going back to eating, he gazed deeply at his food and asked softly, "So... What do you imagine him doing when you have a crush?" he blushed a bit and felt kind of shy.. Nervous, "Do you imagine him like, as a wife or something?"

Matthew blinked at him before smiling, highly amused. "Um, no, not really..." He chuckled and leaned on his hand, staring at his food fondly, lost in thought. "I suppose I mainly imagine... Well, I mean, since I know it would never happen, I'm just happy imagining us being together, you know? Just, hanging out... Sitting together and watching a movie, cuddling, hugging..." He blushed more and spoke quietly for the last word: "K-kissing..."

Alfred blinked. So.. Kissing, just small loving things... Wanting the other to be happy? Man, crushes were kinda weird... Like an in between of love and being friends? It just sounded... Confused...

"Well, why... /France/ of all people...?" he raised a brow, "And not someone like... Ukraine, or... I don't know, Seychelles...?"

Matthew seemed a little embarrassed now. He fidgeted and said, "Well... This probably won't come out right, but... I have a closer relationship with him, since... since he raised me for a little while." He chuckled a bit. "I saw him act in such a way that he would never act in front of anyone else, and... I don't know, I've /tried/ to like someone else, but you know?" He smiled. "I just like the France I've gotten to know... closer than anyone else could ever get with him."

Alfred gave an interested look and knitted his hands together. Propping his elbows up, he rested his head in his hands and murmured, "Interesting..." he creased a brow, "Have you noticed him doing any odd behaviors lately..?"

Matthew frowned and nodded. "Yes, that's why I'm worried..." He sighed and looked down at the table. "He's become so... sad, lately, and he won't tell me why..."

"Hmmm," Alfred thought about it for a moment... But he couldn't come to a conclusion... Something was off though, "Weird..."

But now in the present, telling Arthur this before they opened the diary again... Things were starting to make more sense... Except for his... P-Possible um.. Crush...?

"Alfred!" Arthur's voice snapped him out of his thoughts. "You were staring into space, are you alright?" He looked at him with just a bit of concern, his head tilted slightly to the right and his brows creased.

Alfred shivered and gave a shaken look. Gazing up into Arthur's eyes, he sighed softly and explained what he had remembered, and why they should open the diary again.

"... Matthew had a crush on him?" Arthur asked, not exactly knowing how to feel about that. "Seems a bit odd to me... I wonder if France ever knew about it?"

Alfred took the diary and leafed through it a bit. He suddenly got to an entry through and gave a shocked look. Blinking slowly, he paled and looked up, "You... Better read this..."

"What is it?" Arthur asked, his heart skipping a beat with worry as he took the book and started reading.

Dear Diary,

Hey. I've... Been thinking things through lately.. I've been noticing the looks... And the soft smiles... But... I really don't trust them... Matthieu is just mistaken- he doesn't know how disgusting I am... I just wish he'd forget... And move on because...

I'm too afraid to let him in anymore. I don't want him to figure out, laugh at me... Say that my new life is just a frivolous dream...

... Everyone would. They'd take my dress and rip it off me... Taunt me, tie me down and cut me... Tear me down and break me...

I've tried a noose but it isn't working... I'm afraid they'll come and get me.. B-But I'm trying to fall asleep as fast as I c-can, but the pills haven't settled in-

Just... God in Heaven above... Forgive me for what ever I have done to bring all this scorn... I must or deserved it but... Just have mercy on me... I'm truly sorry.

**A dying angel, soon to come, François B  
Read and Review~.**


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